Found a great guy but no sex appeal. Should I hang on?

Dear counselor, thank u for this web site it a very good one which will help singles find their way in their relationships. my question is this pls counselor if you meet a gut that proposes to marry u and he is a Christian and has the qualities u have actually prayed for but u are not sexually attracted to him as in physically attraction becos of that u really dont love him what do u do? DO U JUST FORGET ABOUT HIM OR HOLD ON TO THE OTHER ASPECTS AND MARRY HIM SINCE THE OTHER THINGS U PRAYED FOR ABOUT UR HUSBAND TO BE HE HAS THEM . URGENT SHYGIRL

Hi, Please read one of our featured articles this week. It’s titled “NO SPARKS AT ALL?” IT ANSWERS YOUR QUESTION. WHILE PHYSICAL ATTRACTION IS NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING, IT IS VERY IMPORTANT. CAN YOU OVERLOOK THIS PHYSICAL ASPECT? IF YOU KNOW YOU CAN BE ATTRACTED TO OTHER MEN AFTER YOU GET MARRIED, PLEASE DONT MARRY HIM. IT CAN LEAD TO ADULTERY IN FUTURE

We are courting but I want him to wait four more years. What do you think?

I have been friends with this guy and then we later got attracted an we’ve dated and now we’re courting and we’ve promised each other Marriage. How do u think we shld go about it. He’s 30 and am 22 the right age but am not ready until its 4-5yrs time cos of my schooling. Wat do u think?

Hi, I dont advise long courtships because a lot can go wrong. The guy is about ripe for marriage and you have to discuss to be really sure that he can wait for you. I agree that your school is important. You can hold on if both of you are really determined but dont get into sex before marriage. That will destroy everything

How do I cope with long-distance relationship?

Hi, Having a relationship with someone far away is tough but it can be handled. You need to write letters, talk on the phone and send e-mails. Be sure to know how the person feels about you. If either of you meets someone else and you lose interest in the far away guy, good luck

Is it good to be in a relationship without sex?

Hi, The best kind of relationship is the one without sex! When you are involved sexually, you cannot get to really know each other and you will regret it later in life. This is one of the reasons why people get divorced. You have everything to lose and nothing to gain! Sex before marriage is sin and people suffer for it later in life. Trust me, don’t get involved in sex before marriage. It destroys great destinies.

I am afraid of loosing her after school. What should I do?

I am in love with a girl, that is of same age as i am. she is well behaved in fact due to her character, i will want to spend the rest of my life with her. i am in a different school from hers, but i only see her whenever i go home on holidays. funny enough i don’t even spend up to a week or two during my holidays, due to my academic schedule. this means i rarely spend time with her. i do cal l her often at least once in two days, for over a year now we’ve lived much longer on the telephone than on real life. my problem is that this girl is in the same level as i am and she is doing a four year course while i am doing a five year course. she is exceptionally beautiful, there is no reasonable man that would come close to her that would want to let her go. the girl actually loves me but u see, i believe that she might not be able to wait for me if she sees someone who is ready to offer everything i do and might even offer more, i want to believe that because we are all humans. please is there any light at the end of the tunnel? actually i should not be thinking about this now but this girl is one in a million that’s why i don’t want to take chances

Hi, I don’t think you should be afraid that you might lose this girl. If you’re doing your best, relax. It’s either she is for you or she’s not. If you do your best and she still goes off with another guy, then she was not meant for you. You’ll surely find someone better I guarantee you. Keep your fingers crossed because on the other hand she may not leave you for someone else. If you let her know you are insecure however, she will leave you. Ladies don’t like insecure guys. It turns them off. Cheers

What is the right age for girls to date?

At what age is it right for a girl to go into serious relationship?

Hi, the best age to start serious dating, that can lead to courtship is when you are physically emotionally, mentally and materially mature. I can’t say a specific age because people mature differently. If you date (serious dating) when you are not ready to get married, you run a high risk. It pays to be patient.

She abandoned me when I was in trouble. Should I take her back?

I fell in love with this girl when i was still in the university. then she was in her sss3. she later gained admission into my university. and we had a pretty nice relationship in school, though with some little clashes you know. after school i was accused of murder of one student who died in one of the cult clashes in school. as a result i was arrested and detained for some months. my girlfriend never bothered to visit me in prison at all although she knew i was innocent of the crime. i felt real bad in prison. she later came to visit me once when one of my friends saw her in school and scolded her and after that she never came. I later got released and some weeks after my release this same girl came running after me. telling me to forgive her. that she received some threats from the cult brothers of the dead boy that they will deal with her. this was a girl i loved with m y whole heart and she betrayed me. i forgave her but i dont think i still love her. she always says she will make it up to me. to be frank i had in mind marring this girl before. but now i dont feel much for her. i now see her as one that come only when things are good pls advise me on what to do am confused. her parents knows me very well and they never knew all these and my parents also know her. am confused

Hi, If the girl is telling the truth about receiving threats, you cant really blame her. I must warn you that ladies are sometimes not as steadfast as men when it comes to love. Since the girl has asked for your forgiveness, you may want to give her a chance. If she is the type that is a fair weather lover, I’m sure she will show her true colours again. Dont rush things, take it easy and watch.

How would I know if a guy loves me?

Hi, What most people call love is actually lust not love. Love is a commitment not a feeling. Love involves a decision to stay committed to someone no matter what. You do not prove that you love someone by having sex with them. Love is not blind. You need to open your eyes to know if someone loves you or not. The best definition of love can be gotten in the Bible, in 1 Corinthians, Chapter 13. Please read it. It will help you. True love involves seeking someone else’s welfare at all times. It involves putting someone else’s feelings ahead of yours. If a guy cannot wait to be married before having sex, he’s not in love. He’s in heat! Just because a guy buys gifts for you doesnt mean he loves you. God bless

I am no good in bed. Can I get a wife?

I have a big question to ask and to be candid i’m not really free asking any body this particular question. I was wondering if a man can get a wife when he is not good on bed? knowing fully well that the average Girl will not want him.

Hi, believe me, there is nothing like a man who is not good in bed!

Every man has to learn how to make love to his wife because women are different. What each woman likes is different.

There is no point trying to date girls in a bid to learn how to be good in bed because you may die trying if you get AIDS or some other deadly STD.

That is apart from the fact that you will be going against God’s plan and you will pay dearly for it.

When you get married, with love and understanding, you can learn how to become good in bed and it will be safe then.

Thanks